a mild rant…

but mostly i just feel like typing. because i took a typing test and i was pretty fast if i do say so myself. only i fuck up alot because i think AIM chatting has ruined any hope of me typing with caps and proper punctuation. but anyway. today was a really awful day because im like a second from quitting my job. after agreeing to change my job completely because no one else in the office wants to do this job. or think of a solution i was basically volunteered to do this job. Not only would i be taking on more work and stress, i’d had to work closely with the most impossible attorney. My old job was just doing simple office tasks. Mail, organizing, copies, scanning, you know, easy brainless things. So now i have to do a full time job, in only part time hours with deadlines and filing and dealing with mortgage companies and contacting clients and contact people. I was ok with the pay at first, but when my co workers bitched to my boss about taking on my most SIMPLEST tasks, he gave them raises. He didnt however even consider giving me a raise. Even after i basically told him i didnt want to do it. but i was a ‘team’ player. and no one else thinks theres any other way to get this done. Mostly no one else wants to work with the attorney. Ok fine, I get it. I have to do it. But when i hear about the other secretaries getting raises, which btw pisses me off because THEY asked to get these tasks if it meant they didnt have to do this job they were pushing onto me, when i finally get the courage to ask for a raise. he replies with the most smug smart ass answer, “50 cent raise, but dont screw up you need to be on top of this’ i was beyond furious. Disrespect me after i go out of my way for you. i could have just argued. but i didnt. im not that kind of person. instead i will just keep looking for a new job like i have been for the past 6 months. I really just want to be like “i dont need you and i dont deserve this kind of disrespect.” and quit.

Why I’m single: reason #13

i never leave my room to meet anyone.

i think im actually really determined this time

… i think i might actually get my life together.

i remember saying, when i was in highschool, if i didnt have my life together by 23, id join the military or kill myself.

now im about to be 22. and im a mess. but im working on it.

i think its hard because most of my friends are older or have babies so it seems like they know what they are doing. i still feel so lost.